Saturday, April 29, 2017

Horizon: Zero Dawn Review and Photo Safari

OXYBORB.COM Official Review Score for Horizon: Zero Dawn: 11/10 

Great, now that that's out of the way, let me show you the pictures I took during my playthrough:

SPOILERS ahead! The game is best played not knowing anything, and I'm not holding back!
 
Horizon: Zero Dawn is beautiful. It has a camera mode that I frequently used to capture these shots.

I score this game 11/10 because it is wonderful in all ways. All I really want out of this game is for it not to end.

Writing & Art Update, The Classified Show


Man, TONS has happened in my life, artistically. I have had an unusual amount of time to devote to creating lately, and I’ve packed it in with art.

First, a big update about The Unraveler. It’s ready to go. I’ve edited it and edited it, used feedback from a bunch of people, and I’ve edited it some more. I think it’s time to try to sell it to agents, so wish me luck on that front. I’ve been perfecting my query letter.

Second, I’ve been working on the sequel novel, and it’s going to be incredible. I’m not trying to toot my own horn, but I’ve designed my novels to have huge payoff. The stuff I’m coming up with is, first and foremost, FUN. That’s the goal of my novel writing: to create novels that have a core rooted in FUN.

Also, I’ve been painting. She’s a character in my novel named Rosalyn, one of my favorites. I’m going to do a blog next month about my painting process, but I’ll share this for now:



Rosalyn Eris of The Unraveler






I also took part in another 24/hour new play festival with PRIME. They have an awesome new website. I was a set designer this time around, and so I helped to create the set that is pictured below. It’s supposed to be an apartment for a conspiracy theorist that has been ransacked by an unknown agency. Evidence is littered through the set. Each of the plays was about a conspiracy of sorts, so the set went with each.

Thanks for reading, catch up with me on twitter.


A post shared by David Oxyborb Aye (@oxyborb) on

Sunday, April 23, 2017

Fly up into sky - Pranking telemarketers

I love pranking telemarketers. To be clear, I never call them to prank them. I prank them when they call me and annoy me for my time. Half of telemarketers are just scams anyway, so I love being "that weird call" they had during the day.

*Telemarketer calls me*


Telemarketer - Hello, is this David? Yes? Hello?

Me - Uhyesssss. Allo, oui?

Telemarketer - Hello, I'm from _________ Car Insurance, can I tell you about how I can save you money today?

Me - Of course.

Telemarketer - What's your address?

Me - *ignores question* Can you cover me? Uhyes?

Telemarketer - Tell me, what kind of car do you have?

Me - Ford.

Telemarketer - Ford what?

Me - Helllliiiicopterrrrr.

Telemarketer - Excuse me?

Me - Ford Escort.

Telemarketer - Oh, right, I see--

Me - Ford Escort Helllliiiicopterrrrr..

Telemarketer - Did you just say helicopter?

Me - Uhyes. That's right, a Ford.

Telemarketer - Like an automobile?

Me - Uhyes, autohelicoptermobile

Telemarketer - You have two vehicles? A Ford Escort and a helicopter?

Me - No, I have button, push, then the blades make helllliiiicopterrrrr, fly up into the sky.

Telemarketer - You drive an Escort on the road.

Me - Uhyes, drive on road, push button, blades, fly up into the sky. One vehicle.

Telemarketer - That's impossible. Are you joking me?

Me - No. Now, my address is ______. My zip code is 62220.

Telemarketer - Ok, well we have the lowest rates in the Belleville area--

Me - And my skycode is 7229.

Telemarketer - A what?

Me - For fly up into sky. My skycode.

Telemarketer - Okay. Can I mail you a package on our newest rates?

Me - Uhyes, of course.

Telemarketer - So your name is David? Spelled D-A-V-I-D?

Me - Correct.

Telemarketer - Your last name is Aye? A-Y-E?

Me - No.

Telemarketer - Oh, can you please spell it?

Me - H

Telemarketer - Ok

Me - E

Telemarketer - Ok

Me - L

Telemarketer - Ok

Me - I

Telemarketer - Ok

Me - C-O-P-T-E-R

Telemarketer - Oh lord *hangs up*




-update ROUND 2-


Telemarketer - *calls me* Hello, I'm Jean from _______. Just so you know, this call may be recorded for quality assurance purposes. I'm calling you today--

Me - And just so you know, I am recording this call as well.

Telemarketer - That's fine, sir. I'm calling today to let you know that my company's truck will be in your neighborhood picking up large appliances and electronics for recycling and disposal --

Me - How would you like to be a voice actor in my next animated flick? Please, if you could, say "Waffle cone"

Telemarketer - Waffle cone.

Me - That's good, but if you could say it a bit angrier. WAFFLE CONE!

Telemarketer - WAFFLE CONE! My company is offering a chance to get rid of appliances for free. What can I call you Mister..?

Me - The Director.

Telemarketer - [...]

Me - [...lol...]

Teletmarketer - Do you have any thing that needs being picked up?

Me - OK, so you're an evil ice cream man, and this kid is bothering you for pistachio almond. Say, "That will be two dollars and fifty cents!" with gusto.

Telemarketer - I don't think you're interested. *hangs up*